I have known a couple of friends who were glued at the hip. They had the lack of foresight to start a business together. One of them had invested money in the business, while the other spent a lot of time sitting and managing the company. One day the inevitable happened: the first thought that the second had been robbing him. The second felt stabbed in the back by this, and it ended with the two bosom enemies hiring an independent arbitrator to walk through the business, hands on hips. They paid $8,000 a month. In the early 1990-s, that was worth more than it is now. The arbitrator offered a quasi-good-Samaritan solution, which was to pay some compensation and part as friends. Because there was no money left to continue the war, they had to agree on an amount for compensation.
One of the most intellectual magazines published an article about friendship, which is a no-less-difficult relationship than hate or love. Let’s discuss the thesis.
It’s believed that good friends are good for your health. They can improve your immunity, reduce blood pressure, slow dementia among the elderly, and even reduce your chance of dying at any given time… not to mention improve your creative impulse, if we aren’t talking about friends playing dominoes or going to the bar.
But it turns out that friendships can be difficult, terrible, nerve-racking, and even… toxic.
It turns out that not all friendships are mutual. Some people flatter themselves with the thought that they’re friendly with someone, while that other person has a quite different opinion. This often happens with famous people, who have millions of “close friends”. A celebrity, whom you are sure is aware of your friendship, does not remember you. Or believes you are a random and obsessive acquaintance.
All of these phenomena take place on Facebook, which generates not only the illusion of friendship and other hoaxes, but also real friendships and enemies.
As for “real reality”, the best aphorism about offline friendship was uttered by my girlfriend about one of our acquaintances: “He’s one of those idiots that has a lot of friends.”
Real friendship (which we will temporarily assume is mutual here) is usually different as far as its fatal flaws are concerned.
This happens because, according article’s author, you aren’t in a hurry to answer the phone when friend X calls, because friends – faithful, reliable, interesting – may carry unpleasant feelings, as well. The depressed give depression, the overweight cause us to gain weight, and those that drink and smoke ensure that we drink and smoke more.
In regard to depression, I can agree (myself an eternal example, as I can appear jovial but my heart is a nightmare), and about the other… I have a friend who while we’re eating will suggest about every 7 minutes, “Let’s go smoke!” However, she never suggested that everyone smoke. Non-smokers can go out on the balcony to inhale the faint smoke and fresh ozone and stretch all their limbs, making this quasi-smoke-break more enjoyable and rewarding.
As for the other, you actually drink more (how else are you supposed to respond to his puzzled, “Dude…?”), but is it as important when you consider that meeting up offline today isn’t as frequent? It isn’t an easy task to become an alcoholic when you’re only drinking once every 2-3 months.
All this is fairly obvious. But very soon I will tell you about something that was new to me, and I suspect you will find it unexpected, as well. Some friendships are worse than having an enemy. How is that possible? I will make some eye-opening statements about it later on.
By the way, if you can see big floaters in your eyes, or you see flashes or three moons, be considered, that all of them are your enemies, and they are worse than toxic friends. Don’t put off making an appointment with Benjamin Eye Institute.
LASIK, CATARACT, GLAUCOMA:
Take advantage of the latest technology and one of the best teams in LA
Benjamin Eye Institute 310-494-7193